Getting Back Together in 4 Easy Steps
Getting back together after a breakup, unless the relationship was completely terrible, is what most people want to do. In fact, sometimes, even if the relationship was unhealthy, most people still think about getting back together.
However, you shouldn’t think about
getting back together with your ex if he ever used physical violence or words to hurt you. That is not a healthy relationship.
If you were in a relationship like that and your ex broke up with you, then consider yourself extremely lucky.
Otherwise, most relationships follow a fairly predictable pattern.
When you first meet someone everything is wonderful and new. He can do no wrong and you can do no wrong in his eyes. After a short while comfort sets in. You adjust to each other.
When the newness wears off and the comfort is there things in the relationship begin to change. The little quirks you were willing to overlook before actually start to bother you now.
There is an expression: “Familiarity breeds contempt.” Truer words couldn't be spoken about relationships.
When couples begin to get comfortable and familiar with each other, trouble usually follows. This is exactly what tests the strength of the relationship. It takes work and effort to maintain a relationship. Sometimes, when things break, instead of getting back together, the other person wants out of the relationship completely.
Do you believe, despite it being over, your relationship is worth salvaging, even if the other person has made it clear, it's over? If you do then you need some answers on getting back together with your ex.
Here are four steps you can take towards getting back together:
Getting Back Together Step 1
Saying you are sorry is one of the best ways of getting back together. Even if it doesn't get your ex back, it's usually the best first step. Be sure that you say sorry for the right reasons. After a breakup it can be easy to blame yourself for everything. Remember, it takes two people to have a successful relationship. Knowing what exactly to apologize for is critical.
Whatever you do, when you apologize don't let your ex bait you into an argument. The biggest irony of saying sorry to an ex is that it can easily lead to another fight. If you say you're sorry, and your ex brings something else up, don't get defensive with him. Stay calm; keep your emotions, your ego, and your pride in check.
Getting Back Together Step 2
Sit down and talk things out
If your ex is up to it, set a time where both of you can sit down and talk. Whatever you do don't beg, plead, cry, or force your ex into this. If he doesn’t want to, then just go to the next step. If he does agree, you're going to have to keep your emotions in check. This isn't the time to get into a fight again. Make it clear to your ex that you have no desire to bring blame into the discussion.
You want to talk about the issues objectively. If you talk strictly about the issues without assigning blame, you'll get better results. It is best if you can get a therapist or an expert in the field of relationships involved with this, if at all possible.
Getting Back Together Step 3
Give some space
This may seem counter-intuitive to getting back together. You have to remember just because you want to talk to him or see him, doesn't mean he does to. It is crucial to allow your partner some space. A brief time away from each other, before you try to win him back, will give you both time to cool down and a chance for him to miss you. If you're in touch with him all the time, he won't be able to miss you.
Getting Back Together Step 4
Show him you care about yourself
Prove to him that you care about yourself. If you seem desperate, clingy, and whiny, you will not succeed. If you sit around the house waiting for him to call or keep checking your email every few minutes hoping to get his message, you're not doing yourself any favors. Hang out with friends. Go to the movies, go to a concert, go to the shops. Whatever, just get up and get out and live your life.
It's best if you're not there when he calls. Then he'll be wondering what you're doing. If you're out and your cell phone rings and it’s your ex, don't answer it. Let the call go into voice mail. The best thing to do is wait until the next day before you call him back. Tell him you were busy, and you didn't have time to call him back. This will probably shock him and he may even start to pursue you again.
Almost everyone in their life has had to go through a breakup. A breakup is a strange thing. Most things in life, the more you do them, the easier it becomes to do. With breakups no matter how many you've had to go through in the past, they certainly don't become any easier to go through.
Did you know that most relationships CAN be salvaged? You may find it difficult to believe that almost every break up for whatever reason…infidelity, plain old lost passion, loss of interest, a stolen heart and worse.
You see there IS a "recipe for love" as well as a recipe for winning back and keeping some ones interest, desire, passion, heart and love.
Do you know the fastest and shortest path back into his heart, mind and
soul? This secret is so counter-intuitive it may never occur to you.
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For Getting Back Together:
Does He Want Me Back
Signs Your Ex Wants You Back
Getting Back Together Tips
Getting Back Together in 4 Steps
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